lessons from dad

The past week has been a bit rough. I rushed home due to my father’s rapidly deteriorating condition (we went from “dad’s going in for surgery” to “you need to come home and January won’t be soon enough” in a week). But the last few days by my father’s side really made me think about all of the things that my dad has taught me and given me in my life. He hasn't so much articulated these lessons, as let me know that these are the things I should always strive to do by his example and by his expectations. So below are ten things that dad has taught me, and although I’m sure there are plenty more things he has given to me this gives a pretty good idea of just what my dad was about.

1. Never give up! (This sort of goes hand in hand with never quit) This meant that even if I got frustrated or hit a wall and didn’t know what to do next I just had to persevere until I got it figured out. IT definitely helped to teach me to think outside of the box.

2. Anything that you start you need to finish. Sometimes this means that I had to do things that I didn’t especially want to, always had to finish a season for a sport, had to complete the things I was starting. It’s nice to realize that at this point that type of sheer stubbornness has gotten me through many an activity.

3. Actions speak louder then words. If you know my father at all you’ll understand why I say that. I always know he loves me even if the words were not often offered. When the words began to be spoken recently I knew that things were not going so well.

4. There is always a way to make a project better. In reality this meant that I’d come to dad with an idea that I wanted to replicate expecting some small project which then usually was translated into a more complex thing...but always ends up nicer then I ever expected.

5. Innovation and creativity are fun. Curiosity is a wonderful thing. If something no longer works then you might as well open it up and see what made it go originally. You never know what you’ll discover if you start to pay attention to the things around you.

6. I'm strong enough to do just about anything that I put my mind to. Being a woman is not an excuse for being able to do something. You may just have to think outside of the box in order to accomplish it.

7. I can always depend on myself, independence is an acquired trait. It might have been hard when my parents dropped me off at camp for a month and told me not to call, but I learned that I was okay on my own.

8. There is no sense in saying you can't do something, if you practice it long enough it and consistently enough you will achieve the ability . When I was little dad used to sit and practice soccer skills. It was left foot, right foot for hours on end....now I don't even think about it. This is definitely a lesson that has served me well whenever I attempt to start learning a new skill.

9. You might seem to ignore people sometimes but you always keep track of what is going on. Then when it really matters you do know all the information and have a way to help them out if they need it. And you should always provide help when it’s needed.

10. Family is important. You can always depend on them to be around and support you when you need it. Sometimes I thought it was crazy that my parents were at every soccer game I played in, but I knew they were interested in what I was doing. When people were saying “you’re going where?” I knew I could depend on him to be curious and supportive about my new destination whether it was in Africa, Turkey or beyond. That is a gift that is without measure.
Dad has influenced and shaped my life in so many ways. He may be gone now, hopefully to a place where he no longer feels the pain from his cancer, but he will never be forgotten. I can’t forget a man who had such an impact of the type of person I’m growing up to be. I love you daddy. Rest in peace.